This unusual blog post is going to tell you about the roles and needs of both men and women in a relationship and namely, in a family. We have conducted thorough research and have found 958 thousand inquiries of different people on search engine. People keep searching information about healthy, proportional relationships and what roles each of the partner plays in those relationship .
People wonder how to recognize these needs and how to take them all into account to build a healthy and proportional relationship? However, we didn’t find an accurate answer to our questions. Therefore, this post was created to give you a better insight into the following:
Why do people really get married?
We all used to think that we get married only because we are in love. This is not exactly true. Absolutely all people are selfish and do everything to have their benefits. We do get married to get some rights that are very difficult to get when you are not married.
A relationships hard work but unfortunately, people do not want to do this work. They do not accept their partners for who they are but simply hope that after marriage, their partners would change. Did you ever notice that lots of girls try to accept all of the men’s shortcomings until their marriages?
For example, you are not a smoker and do not like to have sex every day. Your partner is a smoker and is very sexually active. What do most women do in this case? Yes, they pretend that they are ok with smoking and having sex daily. What happens after marriage? The ladies open their true selves and start changing their partners according to their needs.
This all is apriori wrong. Our rights can be followed and ensured only when each of us fulfills his or her duties. When you pretend to accept people with their shortcomings only to get married, you sentence yourself to a miserable life. If you really hate smokers and get married to a smoker, you will never be happy. And there is no need to expect your partner to change after marriage. This is truly selfish.
The best relationship advice is to never pretend that you accept your partner for who he or she is if you do not really accept it. You will never be able to change your wife or husband after marriage because this person was totally sure you were ok with everything if you agreed to get married. All of such actions will only lead to arguments, disagreements, fights, and eventually, divorce. When setting up freaky relationship goals, you will never be able to build a proportional relationship.
Here is the most important and working relationship advice for men — If you guys want to have a really happy family and a healthy relationship, you have to make sure your wife is fully provided by you. Your wife should not work like a horse equally to her man to contribute to your common budget! She must have enough free time to cook a tasty dinner for you and be ready to please you in your bedroom. Otherwise, if your wife is just a hardworking partner who earns and works as much as you do, all you can count for is ready-to-cook food from your microwave oven.
The needs of a woman in a family
Before looking for efficient dating advice,you should first understand the role of a man and a woman in a relationship.All women have three basic needs in their relationship and marriage:
- Intimacy. Attention, guys, we are not speaking about sex here. All women have a big necessity of intimacy with their men. They must feel needed and understood by their men. You have to be close to your lady. If you do not know how to be a real man in a relationship,do everything to make your woman feel comfortable emotionally. For a lady, intimacy means discussion. Women just talk a lot. If you listen to your wife, she is happy. If you don’t, she is miserable.
- Security. Any woman must feel secured and protected by her husband. It does not mean that you have to be physically strong and beat everyone who offends your wife. Yes, a man should be able to protect a lady physically. This is not the most important though. Your wife must feel protected both emotionally and financially. If you do not provide for your woman financially, she is not secured; therefore, her needs are not met. Emotional security is also very important for women. What does it mean? It means that a man takes into account her needs and wishes. For example, ladies cannot have a sexual activity every day; their physiology is different from men’s. If you do not insist and understand that, if a woman may not be afraid to reject sleeping with you tonight, she feels emotionally protected. Avoid such freaky relationship goals.
- Gratitude. The things guys should never do in a relationship include being not thankful to your wife. Both men and women should get gratitude for their work. Your wife does a lot of things at home even if you do not notice them. She should feel that you appreciate everything she is doing. Without it, your woman will be not satisfied. For that reason, a lady should be able to express her wishes and desires. Gratitude means acknowledgment that you have never met anyone like this lady and appreciate everything she gives you.
The needs of a man in a family
It is necessary to know not only how to become a better man in a relationship but also what do men really need from their relationships and marriage. Just like women, all gentlemen have their needs in a marriage. Each woman must be aware of them and be able to meet the needs of his husband:
- Be needed. Each man has to feel that a woman needs him. To make him feel needed, you should always appreciate his achievements and effort. Do not be afraid to let your husband know how much you appreciate that he provides for your family, that he fixed a bookshelf or took you for a picnic. It all is really important for a man. If his efforts are not appreciated, he simply stops doing everything he was doing because he can see no feedback and no sense in making efforts. If a man sees that no matter what he is doing, you are not satisfied, he chooses not to do anything at all.
- Be free. A man needs freedom while most ladies strive to limit it so much. Everyone should have his or her personal space and men do not like when their space is interfered with. Do not control your man, let him feel free. By no means, investigate his phone or social media. Trust is the only key to ensure each other’s freedom.
- Be able to change by himself. Dear ladies, never ever try to change your husband. A man must feel totally free to change himself whenever he needs and wants it. You accept your man with all his shortcomings and disadvantages when you decide to marry him. There is no need to start changing your partner after marriage. If a man wants, he should have a chance to change himself and you, as his woman, should give him this opportunity.
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Stages of Dating 4th Stage-Decision
Stages of Dating 5th Stage- LOVE
The main man’s roles in a family
A man’s role in a marriage is not just to earn money, he has much more things to do to be a complete man and happy. A man has three roles in his family:
- Leader. Do you know, what should a man do in a relationship to feel happy and complete? He must feel a leader. No, it affects women’s rights by no means. The nature of all men is the nature of leaders. They must have such an opportunity; otherwise, men do not fulfill their roles. When you try to suppress his leadership, you make a man suffer.
- Defender. If you wonder about the qualities of a real man in a relationship, you should know that a man must protect his woman. This is one of his most important roles. Not only do women need to be protected by their men but men must feel strong enough to protect and defend their women. Without this role, they cannot be complete men and happy in their relationships.
- Breadwinner. No matter that we live in times of equality for both men and women, a man cannot be a man without being a breadwinner in his family. Even if your wife works and earns a lot, you should be able to earn more and fully provide for your wife and children. If a man is deprived of the opportunity to provide for his family, he is miserable. However, it doesn’t mean that women should sit and wait for men to marry and start providing for themselves fully. A married woman can afford to sit at home. While you are still not married though, you should also be able to meet your needs by yourself.
How to build a proportional relationship?
When speaking about the roles of men and women in relationships, it is necessary to cover relationship goals, as well. Quite often, people fail in their relationships not only because they do not play their roles and meet one another needs but also because they set up freaky relationship goals.
With such goals, it is impossible to build a proportional relationship, unfortunately. Before we keep finding out which purposes you should pursue in your relationship, let’s find out, what a proportional relationship is.
What is a proportional relationship?
A proportional relationship is a relationship between a man and a woman, in which both men and women have appropriate goals and meet one another’s needs. We have already discussed the needs of men and women in a relationship. To meet those needs, both men and women should play their roles. A man must be a defender, a breadwinner, and a leader to be happy in a relationship. A woman must be feminine and do not try to change a man. In other words, it is a harmonious relationship that has a balance in each aspect of it.
Why you should avoid freaky relationship goals
A relationship without goals is almost a utopia. Before you get into it, you should clearly understand what you expect from it and why do you start this relationship. Unfortunately, both men and women are selfish and they pursue their egoistic goals when dating.
What do you want to get from your partner? Normally, men want to have constant access to sex while women dream to get married. They set up these freaky goals and try to reach them no matter what. However, when a relationship starts with these purposes, it is sentenced to failure. Here is why.
Normally, men and women should spend a lot of time getting to know one another. Months should pass before they get married or start a relationship. It is crucial to get to know each other, ask the right questions, and not start a relationship if something does not meet your needs or expectations.
Instead of doing that, people both rush to reach their freaky relationship goals. Men simply rush to have sex and women try to give it because they think this will “keep” the man and lead to marriage. Unfortunately, even if it leads to marriage, it will hardly be successful and exactly for that reason, the divorce rate is so high. People did not work on their relationships and did not put in any effort to get to know one another and understand whether they match. They both simply try to meet their selfish needs the soonest and pretend to be absolutely different people.
Why pretend? Well, a woman pretends to accept a man for who he is and to be very convenient and perfect just to become a wife. After reaching this freaky goal, she starts changing her man because she is not happy with all of his downsides. A man, in turn, does not see any reasons for getting married because his woman already plays the role of his wife. Men, simply, have already reached their goals and do not see any reasons to move further.
To avoid all this, including unhappy marriages and divorces, as well as failing to reach a proportional relationship, both men and women should set the appropriate goals before starting any relationship. Their goals should not be marriages as soon as possible or having a relationship as soon as possible but to marry the right person. This person should be able to meet your needs and play his or her role in your relationships. To reach that, you both should take an effort and choose your partner thoroughly.
How to identify that you are setting up freaky relationship goals?
Appropriate relationship goals for men
Freaky relationship goals
· Protect your woman financially
· Protect your woman emotionally
· Protect your woman physically
· Let your woman self-develop while being a housewife
· Protect your woman sexually
· Your woman does not need any investment and can earn on her needs herself
· You should not listen to your woman, she has friends
· She is strong enough to protect herself
· I need a woman to have a clean house, neat clothes, and dinner only
· I need a wife to have sex whenever I wish
Appropriate relationship goals for women
Freaky relationship goals
· Give femininity to my husband (coziness, tasty breakfasts, care, and tenderness)
· Be thankful for the efforts of my husband
· Find a man who fully meets my expectations in terms of income, attitude, habits, etc.
· I am not a servant; he can cook, clean, and wash everything himself. I am just a goddess to be admired
· Sleep with my husband for expensive gifts (a favor for a favor)
· Sleep with a man even if he does not meet my expectations in hope that he will marry me sooner. I will manage to change him after marriage.
How not become a victim of freaking relationship goals?
Here are the signs of being a victim of freaky relationship goals, as well as some helpful tips on what you should do not to become a victim of those goals.
The signs of setting up freaky relationship goals by your partner
What to do when your partner sets up freaky relationship goals
· Your partner is not grateful for your efforts and actions (household duties, cooking, providing for her, buying food, gifts, etc.)
· Your wife is not doing any household duties and is only taking care of herself
· Your partner is spending more time with her/his friends than you
· Stop doing what you did before and try to talk about it with your partner
· If you are a provider for you both, stop giving her money on her needs, and discuss it. If you do not provide for her and she earns money herself, then you should divide your household duties 50/50. If she is a provider for you both, then she is right and household duties are up to you (find a job and start earning money at least for yourself)
· You both need self-time to spend with your friends. If you lack his/her attention, try to add some romance to your relationship. Put in the effort to spend some precious time together (buy tickets for a short trip, book a table in a restaurant, go to a spa salon, etc.)
Accept each other for who they are
Sorry guys, but you cannot change people. Have you ever tried to change yourself? How many times did you try to start jogging in the morning? Or how many times did you promise to quit smoking and still didn’t manage to do this? Was this really easy to change yourself? We bet, it was not. Why then did you decide that you will succeed in your attempts to change another person?
No, you will never succeed in that. All you reach will be arguments, disagreements, and even divorce. Before even thinking of a marriage, you should pay very close attention to your future partner. Are you happy with everything? Do you reach an agreement in all aspects? No? Then why would you get married to this person?
Put up with the shortcomings of one another
It is necessary to make it clear. First of all, people have their shortcomings and there are no perfect people. Unfortunately, shortcomings cannot be changed. For example, if your partner is very short, he or she cannot become taller even if you want it very much. If you wanted to marry this person, you should accept this shortcoming since it cannot be changed. Otherwise, do not marry. People have their benefits and drawbacks. You should simply not pay attention to your partner’s shortcomings.
If you cannot stand them and they really irritate you, then maybe you have chosen the wrong person? All of these things can be noticed before starting a serious relationship or marriage and if you simply ignore them, this is your biggest fault. Of course, if you have a tobacco allergy and your husband or wife smokes in front of you, this is not a shortcoming; this is not decent behavior. You should never put up with such behavior and explain that he or she cannot do this to you before starting any relationship. This is the main rule of a proportional relationship.
If you do not know how to be a man in a relationship, simply learn not only to accept the shortcomings of your partner but also to highlight her advantages. The same concerns women — learn how to accept the shortcomings of your man and just not pay attention to them and always cherish his advantages. Let’s not forget about the needs of men and women in marriage — they both must receive gratitude for all of their efforts!